


A Name of my Own

by puff22_2001



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, BECAUSE THEY ARE, Bad Japanese, Child Soldiers, Female Friendship, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Identity Issues, Light Angst, the Inners can't be older than TEN in the manga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:29:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23036302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puff22_2001/pseuds/puff22_2001
Summary: Once upon a time, millennia ago, a little girl ached for a name. Another little girl ached for a friend. They found each other.This work is posted as-is from my earliest known draft, circa 2004.
Relationships: Hino Rei & Tsukino Usagi
Kudos: 4





	A Name of my Own

**Author's Note:**

> This story is over fifteen years old. I haven't edited the fanfiction in any way since then. There are cliches, gratuitous (and incorrect) Japanese, and a whole host of other problems. I'm mainly uploading this fanfic so that I can have all of my fanworks in one centralized location with acceptable filing and tagging systems. I plan to eventually go back and at least edit for basic errors, but until then what you see is what you get.
> 
> This work is posted as-is from my earliest known draft, circa 2004.

Disclaimer- I do not own Bishoujo Senshi SailorMoon/Sailor Moon or any of its persons, places, things, plots, or ideas. Naoko Takeuchi, a bunch of people and corporations in Japan, and a bunch of people and corporations in America own it. I, in no way, shape or form, say I own it. Please don't sue me.

"I want a name!" I shouted at the top of my just barely 14-years-old lungs. Hihogosha, my nursemaid and my mother, who had been dressing me for my betrothal dinner, winced.  
"You are not named, honey. You are simply referred to as Sailor Mars."  
"I sniffled and thought of how this situation came to pass. I was born Sailor Mars, of the Mars dynasty, child to King and Queen Mars. I was called nothing but Mars or 'The Baby' until I was taken home a week after I was born. After that, my mother and father both had pet names for me, their only child, but I never had an official, legal name. Over the years, I was called Fire Child, Mars, ChibiHi, and many others of the like. But I never had a real name. Now at ten, just a week after finally meeting Queen Serenity and Princess Serenity, I was hoping mad.  
"Princess Serenity gets a name!" I whined.  
"That's because she is the Princess." My mother sighed.  
"I'm a princess too! I should get a name too!" I said loudly.  
"But she is the highest princess in the kingdom. And you are called Sailor Mars because you will be on duty twenty-four seven all the time in a few years, so none of the Princesses were given names. It would be pointless when you would never get to use them." My mother said gently. She knew my pain, she truly did. But there was nothing she could do.  
"Then can I use my old pet name?" I asked, brightening. Maybe my mother would consent? But this was not to be.  
"I called you ChibiKaki. You are no longer Chibi."  
"Then I could be called Kaki."  
"You know that is my name, and that Queen Serenity ruled just a few years ago that no child should be named after its parents, so the child will have individuality." Mother's patience was wearing thin, but I pressed on, using my sweetest demeanor. I was thinking darkly to myself about how I had no individuality, but I held my tongue. Instead I inquired,  
"Then what is Grandmother's name?" My tone was dripping icky cuteness. I loathed myself right then, but I wanted to know.  
"Kaki, as is mine. You forget that Queen Serenity passed the law only two years ago. I was born much before that. Now, thanks to your passion, we are late. I must go and get dressed. I assume you can finish yourself?" Mother emphasized the ending of our debate with a much unnecessary pull of my corset strings. I glared at her and Hihogosha, who had been suppressing laughter all through our talk, as they left me to finish dressing. I turned to put on my only formal dress, but not before shouting at the closed door,  
"Well, if I can't have a name, I'm sure as hell not being called Mrs. Jadeite!"  
~*~*~*~*~  
I adverted my eyes from anyone I knew, simply so I would not be told 'How lucky I was' or 'How sweet he seemed' I wanted to look for my friends. I was feeling low and mad, and I needed kind Mercury, understanding Jupiter, and resourceful Venus to cheer me up. But when I found them at a table far from the adults, I saw HER, sitting in MY seat, chatting up a storm with Venus, who considered me her best friend. They all seemed to be very happy without me, and because I was already angry, I just kept getting more and more enraged. I thought of going over there and slapping HER pretty little moon face and facing the consequences, but I just learned very recently that Princess Serenity would cry at the drop of a hat. I thought of ignoring them, but I knew they would persuade me to join them, and I knew I would. I was in no mood to be forced to enjoy myself, so I did the only thing I could think of: I left my own party. I told my parents and my betrothed that I had to' powder my nose' and soon as I was out of sight, I ran out the door of our large palace. If I hid, I thought malevolently, it would take days to scour the whole palace and surrounding grounds. Heck, in the thousand or so years my parents had been queen and king, even THEY hadn't been in all the palace's rooms. The only people I told of my plan were my faithful Crows, Demios and Phobos. They looked sternly at me, as if to scold me for my rash behavior.  
"You don't have to live like me!" I hissed. I ran down the corridor and into the gardens. My most favorite place was my mother's gardens. She tended them all her self, with help from me, but without a single servant. There were many flowers, but my absolute favorites were the tulips. They could become just as red as roses, and to me, had a much more pleasing scent. I sat down next to the tulip bush my parents had had planted the day I was born, and wept. I already regretted worrying my parents, even though they probably didn't know I was gone yet. But I couldn't back out now. I would only go back to face my father's wrath, and the disappointed looks from my friends, family, and mostly my princess. I knew I loved her as a sister, but I couldn't get past her little faults. As I sat inhaling the beautiful aroma, I had an epiphany: I didn't like Princess Serenity's clumsiness, crying, or her inability to wake because I feared fault in myself. I didn't want to be inferior, and by denying my feelings, I vented my own frustrations on my newest and most vulnerable friend. I felt terrible, and I began to weep again. "Why must I feel so confused? I want to be Princess Serenity's friend, but I can't stop hurting her. I know she tries her best, but I can't stop ridiculing her." I cried to the full form of Jupiter, the closest planet to Mars, besides Earth. I sobbed to the flowers around me, and I heard the slightest sound of someone breathing. I pretended to nod off, then listened. I soon saw a white slipper step cautiously from behind the bush. And soon I saw the full figure of my Princess. She looked around and then gazed on me with much sisterly love. I pretended to yawn, and I saw her panic. I opened my eyes fully and said, in my sweetest voice, "Why hello, Princess Serenity. Why are you here?"  
"I . . . well, I . . . I was in the bathroom, and I came out as you ran by. I saw you run out to the corridor, and I thought you were sick or something so I followed you. I heard you talking to your crows, and I didn't want you to be alone, even if you didn't know I was there, so I followed you here. You're not mad, are you?" Princess Serenity asked with big teary ears. For the first time since I met her, her tears did not make me livid. Instead, I gestured for her to sit, and I told her my problem. She listened intently, and when I finished she lit up like the crystal chandeliers of the palace ballroom. "I know! All of you girls can think up a name for yourselves, and we'll only used those when we're together!" She clapped her hands in delight. I smiled warmly, the first real smile I ever gave to Princess Serenity.  
"That sounds nice. But what can I be named? I've never actually thought of a NAME, just of the feeling of GETTING one." I said quietly.  
"Hmmm, let me think." Princess Serenity bowed her head, clamped her eyes shut, and concentrated for a few minutes, then right before I lost patience, she popped back up and beamed. "I have it! Your name is something that you have a beautiful one of, and you would give this to save your friends." Princess Serenity looked at me expectantly, but for the first time in my life, I hadn't the foggiest clue. She looked at me, amused but not mocking, and told me the name I would use for the rest of my lives; "your name will be Rei."

Notes-  
1\. This story takes place some time in the Silver Millennium.  
2\. I just thought this up one day. I always wanted to do a Silver Millennium story, but didn't want to get into a big thing. So I wrote this. Also, I can't remember what the names mean. But if someone went to a Japanese dictionary and found out, I would be most grateful.  
3\. I tried to make this as Japanese as possible, but I may have made some errors. Please don't be too harsh.  
4\. I can't stress it enough, please give CONSTRUCTIVE criticism.  
5\. A kind reader informed me I had no indication of Mars’ age, so I put one in. I hope it’s obvious enough, but oh well.  
6\. I know, I know. Rei may seem a bit OOC, but you know what? I don't care. I like her better when she isn't such a jerk.


End file.
